Bonus Friday Post: More Durnken Rambling, And A Flava Flav Reference

Yeah, there's a typo in the title, but it's hilarious and it's staying.

...and yet, I was sure to google "Flava Flav" to make sure I spelled his name correctly.



It's all about priorities.



So, all indications of borderline alcoholism aside, I might be a little tipsy again. Tonight's poison? A locally aged Sangiovese that went perfectly with the eggplant, spinach, and tofu parmesan that I made as part of an intended romatic dinner...



...a dinner that Brian breezed in for, chowed down, and left again, all within the span of 30 minutes or so.



But it's not his fault.


Unfortunately, Brian had to work late again tonight. Something about fire alarms in a hotel not being wired into the mainframe or what have you. So he was in and out and that fancy dinner for two became fast food and here I am, stuck with this opened bottle of Sangiovese and a whole lotta time on my hands.



Because it's Friday, I ain't got no job, and I ain't got shit to do!



Oh, Chris Tucker...you are so, SO dead on.



I had a job interview today. Just some part-time hours working as a receptionist in a veterinary clinic.


And I know you all are thinking about how I'm pretty much employment "slumming," and "oh, god, did you know that woman used to be a professional writer once? Can you BELIEVE that she's working in a veterinary clinic now? How sad!"


But you know what? That kind of job has the potential to make me very, very happy.


..Plus, the bills that keep finding their way into my mailbox don't think I'm too educated to take this job....In fact, they're all in favor of me bringing home some Goddamn INCOME, naaaah' sayin?!?



So yeah, I really want the job. The hours are perfect, allowing me to keep the majority of my day free to pursue my freelance writing business, and the job entails all sorts of moving and animal handling and people interaction - which is exactly what I'm looking for. And no, I'm not going to threaten to slit any of the animals' throats.


That shit stays inside the family.



I have a "working interview" scheduled for this Wednesday, so I'm going to need you all to keep your fingers crossed for me.



Moving on, I may be a little "durnk," but I've decided that this here blog needs a shot of adrenaline. We definitely need to bring some Flava Flav up in this beeyatch.

Not "Flava Flav" the man (I mean, eew, LOOK at him for chrissake!).


"Flava Flav" the spice. The hotness. The queso caliente (those are the only two spanish words I know. Well that, and biblioteca, which I'm pretty sure I just spelled all kinds of wrong).


So, my dear readers, what does it all mean?


It means that I'm in need of a muh-fukin' GUEST POST, son!


Seriously.

This blog needs some 5-hour energy (No jitters! No crash!) in the form of some fresh talent.


Just think - my readers, all 73 of them - reading your awesome guest post and finding the link to your blog.
How cool would that be?
Imagine the possibilities!


So if you think you could be the person to kick this blog in the proverbial ass, by all means, send an email to tapdancinginthedark@yahoo.com.


Don't make me beg. It's not pretty, and things might get a little uncomfortable.


As for the rest of the night? Who knows!
Maybe I'll motivate myself to finish the laundry and clean the bathroom.

Or maybe I'll end up drinking this entire bottle and Brian will find me passed out at my desk in a pool of my own saliva.


Either way, I'm thinking it's gonna be a good night.

(Email me, bitches)