Family Matters

So, my mom just texted texted me with the following:

"I read ur blog about me, fucking hilarious. I also commented, yo."

Which fully proves that A) she is probably the most awesome mom a woman could have, and II) her best efforts at speaking gangsta' are usually thwarted by proper grammar.

For example:

In addition, I would like to drop it like it's hot

...you see my point.

I would also like to point out that her Blogger monniker is "YoMomma," which is both hysterical and accurate, so if anybody sees her commenting, it might be nice to give her a shout-out.
Or your digits.
Or Whatever.

In other news, I'm totally awesome at skiing. I only fell once yesterday. ONCE...during the ENTIRE DAY of skiing. And it was only because the slope was getting mad icy and despite my best efforts to plow, I couldn't slow down (that's what she said).

My sister only fell once too. Of course, whereas I fell for a legitimate reason, she fell about 20 feet from the ski lift. She says she fell because she was trying a fancy turn.
I say she fell because that "fancy turn" was in fact just "a turn." Emily's motto on the slopes is, "smoke 'em if you got 'em."

In other words, she puts her feet into the wedge position and cannonballs down the mountain. It was only later in the day when I suggested that she might try modifying her approach.

Her: Wow, you always seem so...I dunno...in control when you're going down the slopes. I mean, you don't go as fast or anything, but it's still impressive.
Me: That's because I turn.
Her: Turn?
Me: Yeah. Instead of shooting straight down and hoping you don't hit anything, try, like, turning a little bit.
Her: Oh....
Me: ...
Her: How do you turn?

Christ.
Who let that woman on the slopes?

This little tidbit is proof-positive that my sister and I are from the same family tree.

It's also proof-positive that someone in my family is inevitably going to kill someone - and if it's not me shanking some stranger in the face for texting while driving, it's going to be my sister taking out some poor skiier as she flies down the mountain at mach 8.

GERONIMO!!!!!!