Oh, Monday...

Hello Monday.
YOU again!
I wish I could quit you!!!

Leave it to me to start a blog with a gay cowboy reference…

Allright, now I’m just being silly. I thought maybe I could avoid Monday by having an awesome weekend, but I see that strategy never works. Still, it was a great weekend, and I regret nothing.
Well, it was a pretty good weekend. There were some downsides, including one cousin’s one-year-old’s birthday party which was really nice and it was great to see him and all, but involved the reuniting of divorced parents and their new significant others which makes things awkward (speaking of gay cowboys). Its not that they can’t be in the same room together, but when people divorce, it’s usually because they don’t want to hang out together anymore. So, stuffing them into a small-ish livingroom together with little or no distraction other than a crying 1-year old is not my idea of fun. Or theirs. Or their new significant others'. But hey, your cousin’s first-born son only turns 1 once, right? And at least there was cake…

Also on the agenda for this weekend was yard-work because our yard looks kind of like this:

(Minus the dragon, unless you count the aggressive beaver who has been eating our trees like nobody’s business. Yeah, we have a beaver problem. Doesn’t everybody?)

We made some progress in the yard, but it was hard to concentrate when you have a puppy who thinks he’s a living wood-chipper who has been put on this planet to dispose of every piece of wood found in South Jersey. I’m thinking of renting him out to landscaping companies. Of course, I’ll have to warn them of what comes out of the other end while he’s disposing of all that crap (no pun intended). And I wonder why he has gastrointestinal issues. Maybe he’s been hanging out with that beaver – that would certainly explain his zest for wood. Four-months old and already in with the bad crowd. Of all the luck…

We capped off the weekend with a recreational softball game (and by we, I mean Brian. Lord knows every time a ball come flying at me, I run the other way screaming. Except for volleyball. I rock at volleyball). We took Jericho with us to give him some one-on-one and away-from-puppy time. Jericho the Mighty Carpenter Bee Hunter, spent his time eyeing, stalking, and launching himself at bees (with me attached to the other end of the leash, unfortunately). Jericho the Pooper of Inappropriateness also managed to take a ginormous dump in front of Brian's entire softball team, and directly behind two old people sunning themselves in beach chairs. He’s a classy one, that dog - remind me to blog about that time he pooped in the middle of the field at the Fire Department Turkey Bowl Game and then grabbed a goal-cone and took off at top speed. He also tried his hardest to steal a soft pretzel from a little girl, so he’s officially a Bad Dog. Isn’t our little family fun? It’s amazing we’re allowed out in public.

The rest of the weekend was just spent staying cool. We refused to turn on the air conditioner because it’s April, for crying out loud. I’m not one to complain (snicker), but this heat is re-DONK-u-lous. Global Warning Nay-Sayers, meet Exhibit A: Four days of above-90-degree weather with 3 days of April to go.

Man, we are so F*cked.

So, all in all a pretty successful weekend full of gardening, recreational sports, and spending time in close quarters with hostile divorced parents. And dealing with a dog with constant diarrhea. And another dog who steals food from children. And a hungry, hungry beaver.

I heart my life.
Toodles.